I was going to have to get up early this morning to get a mammogram, but Roxy decided that when Leon left at 3:00 am to do his plow route that WE had to get up. So, she's running all around and I say to Hell with it and make some coffee. What does Roxy do? Go right back to sleep! I was too paranoid to go back to sleep thinking I wouldn't wake up in time for my appointment at 8:15, so I sucked it up and stayed up. After the boob smushing was over, I had to run over to the Vets to pick up Roxy's next dose of heartworm pills, then off to Milton. I worked until 12:00 and was ready to crash by then, so I came home, stopping to pick up some meds for me, but not heartworm ones. Haha. I also found out that where I get my mammograms done, they are going out of business or something in a couple months so I will have to go get them done at the hospital now I guess. It sounds like such a little thing and shouldn't be a big deal, but change is hard for me at times, and that really bummed me out.
I called Leon when I got home thinking that maybe since he doesn't have an actual job or anything, (he hangs out at his friend's garage until 5:00 pm every day helping or bullshitting or whatever they do) that maybe he would come home early so we could do some grocery shopping. Of course not! He was "too busy" and said he didn't feel like going" and "who needs to eat anyway?" OK then- FUCK HIM. There will be no supper for him tonight! I don't know, I most likely am being childish about not making dinner tonight, but for Christ's sake, if he wants to be that way then he's got it coming to him! Or not coming to him, as the case may be!
I was seeing red so I just went and tried to take a nap. Roxy decided of course that she had to bark at everything just because I needed some sleep. I don't disturb her sleep, but of course she looks at things in her doggy way and decides my sleep is not her priority! I remembered today was my old dog Ginger's birthday. My brother didn't remember, which surprised me a little, because he loved her maybe even more than I did! I think it's really weird too that Roxy was born on March 20, and sometimes she acts just like old Gin-gin even though she's a totally different breed. Maybe she's channeling Ginger's spirit, since this was her house and she is buried out in the back yard. You never know!
I am just so tired, and that is not helping me deal. I feel like I should be putting out applications for a new boyfriend. HAH! One of my many problems is that I let myself get pushed and pushed, until one day it's just too far and then SNAP! I need to really be more proactive about this relationship issue, and handle it better than I am because right now I don't want to handle it at all. It seems though, that when I do let my feelings be known, I mess that up too, and it doesn't get me anywhere either. OK............BREAAAATHE. Funny how you can forget that most important bodily function!
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